Mine's the red one..
As much as I love to visit my family, Las Vegas gives me itchy eyes, chapped lips, I end up with a bloody nose from the dry air and we won't even get started on the bad hair! My Mom still occasionally asks when I will move back, she's a comedian, that one.
The best part (in theory) is the 55 minute flight from LA. The worst part, now let us just take a moment to list the top 10 worst parts:
1. Super Shuttle must pick you up 3 hours before the flight takes off.
2. Super Shuttle must not re-enter the airport without first taking you on a tour of the city to pick up another poor soul 3 hours before their flight. Sure, I tried to lie and say my flight left later but they are on to this and quiz you on the flight number. Damn!
3. Upon depositing you at the airport, curbside check-in will unzip your suitcase for all to see your undies so that they can swab it for residue. Cat hair must be okay.
4. Purchasing a magazine, bottle of water and a stale protein like bar will cost what the flight did.

5. Flying single means you will always sit next to smelly people or crying children. Luckily, I always have some extra perfume samples to rub slyly alongside my seat and earplugs.
6. 55 minutes is not enough time for stewardess to order a plane full of drinks, go get and deliver drinks and they must retrieve all drinks before landing so if you want to get a cocktail, plan on bringing a beer bong.
7. Peanuts. Only once have I enjoy some sugary coated nuts but obviously that trend didn't catch on. My theory is that there are many people with peanut allergies so they just keep recycling the plain batches.
8. Children love to kick the seats in front of them and parents only half assed try to stop them, and only after you have turned around to give the evil eye.
9. The luggage carousel is always a mile or so away from the actual plane and the luggage will be at the farthest if there are more than one. Vegas has 14. Can you guess which one mine was on?
10.Super Shuttle, when you return, must not leave the airport until it has driven around for at least 3 laps never mind the fact that they all have radios with one volume (extra loud) so they will be called if there are any other travelers going in the same direction, but no they have to stop at every curb to ask anyway. Duh!

You know, the list could go on and on, but then we have all traveled and I have heard some horror stories, like lost luggage and near miss plane crashes, so I will remain calm and silent in line with the other cattle as we enter that tin can and are propelled across the vast polluted skies towards our next destination. Godspeed!